As we enter the new year, tradition encourages us to make commitments to ourselves. We make our list with the best intentions in the world, we share it with our loved ones with a glass of champagne in hand, under the explosion of fireworks, but a few days pass, a few weeks perhaps, and the the euphoria of our new resolutions dissipates in the hustle and bustle of everyday life.
How can we overcome the challenges of change that we have set for ourselves and remain focused on our aspirations to successfully realize our intentions for development?
The challenges of good resolutions
A symbol of renewal since Antiquity, the new year blows a wind of change and evolution which contributes to taking action and questioning oneself. It opens a particular space-time which gives the impression that everything stops and at the same time that everything is possible. It marks the end and the beginning of a chapter. For my part, it is this alchemical dimension of the “death and rebirth” cycle which rings out the ephemerality of Life, which gives me the impetus to seek to evolve as a human being through good resolutions. But let’s face it, these intentions are easier said than done.
Often driven by the euphoria of the end-of-year holidays and the deep desire for change in one's life, good resolutions can be hastily made, and often idealized. A scenario which could well be the fragile foundation which will lead us to falter at the first difficulties encountered.
#1 Take into account the rhythm and routine of daily life
Among these difficulties, resuming a hectic daily life after the end-of-year holidays is certainly the most demanding. Changing a habit or changing a situation requires energy and presence. Thinking that your good resolutions will manifest themselves solely thanks to the help of the Universe may not be enough. So even though it is obviously important to have faith in the magic of life and in its ability to attract the right synchronicities to oneself, from experience, waiting for everything to open up for you without putting anything into concrete place in your daily life may well disappoint you.
Remember that change requires a certain form of rigor, but this can be light and fluid.
#2 Identify self-sabotage
I don't know what it's like for you, but for my part, I usually start the year rather boosted by the energy of renewal that it embodies. With my good resolutions in mind and in my heart, I am confident and delighted by the developments that await me. That said, I have noticed on many occasions that if I do not put anything concrete in place to maintain a good mindset, I slip into doubt and discouragement at the first difficulties encountered. “I won’t make it”, “I aimed too high”, “I’m too much…”, “I’m not enough…” and so on. The inner judge takes over and I lose control of my good resolutions. That said, this process is completely normal, because even if we deeply desire change, it also causes discomfort. So keep in mind that any development, no matter how positive, can generate a form of stress. This is why it is often easier to stay in a comfortable situation even if it no longer suits us, than to make a change.
Remember to be kind to yourself no matter what your inner judge thinks.
#3 Set realistic goals
At the moment, right away, we might think that the same is true for our good resolutions and we would like them to happen in the snap of our fingers. And in this state of mind, we can “have our eyes bigger than our stomachs” by setting a string of good resolutions, each more demanding than the last. This is THE almost certain path to discouragement and failure. So for good resolutions to come true smoothly and happily, it is better to define them thoughtfully and realistically:
- Be specific : your resolutions must be clearly decided
- Make them measurable : they must be quantifiable to identify whether you have fully achieved them
- Be sure they are achievable : you must have the personal resources necessary to achieve them
- Consider their relevance : they must be consistent with your deep aspirations
- Include the temporal element : your good resolutions must be measurable over time. Consider setting milestones.
And do not forget ! Good resolutions are made first with the heart and then with the head.
#4 Denumerize yourself!
We all have little magical moments in the day when we have nothing to do but to wait. If you think about it, there are plenty of them. Accumulated in minutes over a day, these waiting times represent a significant space for introspection and in particular, to take stock of situations with your good resolutions and cultivate a positive state of mind to achieve them. Unfortunately, many of us fill this little “nothing to do” time on social media or scrolling the news. Far from me the idea of putting digital technology on trial or burdening you with a good additional resolution, but to open up a reflection on the time we have to devote to our wishes for evolution. I often hear people say: “I haven’t kept my good resolutions, because I don’t have enough time”. Finally, it is obvious that the frantic pace that we all live in our time, wherever we are, challenges us all. But what if we reintroduced some boredom into our lives rather than filling it with our Smartphones? What would it be like if we took advantage of these little “nothings” to simply be with ourselves?
#5 Keep a journal
Write ! Writing is the first step towards materialization. It invites you to externalize your deep aspirations and to structure them through words. No need to write prose or a novel, the idea is simply to put your good resolutions down on paper. It’s a habit that literally changed my life: my journal! A pretty notepad accompanied by my favorite pen that goes with me everywhere and at all times. Although it took me a few weeks to integrate this new support, it has been a full part of my daily life for years. In addition to allowing me to regularly evaluate the progress of my good resolutions, this magical tool invites me to take advantage of these little times of "nothing" to introspect new aspirations, shape my ideas and formulate my intentions for development.
Adopting a journal means giving yourself a concrete way to achieve your good intentions.
#6 Be kind to yourself
Celebrate every little step! Rome was not built in 1 day. A positive mindset is cultivated on a daily basis. So, give yourself a dose of gratitude every day by valuing your victories of the day, no matter how small, rather than berating yourself for what you didn't do. Keep in mind that it is by climbing a new step each day towards your deep aspirations that you will achieve happiness. And don’t forget that you are the best person to evaluate what is right for you.
Lots of success for your good resolutions and great ascension towards yourself!